Ever been through a stage of life where you finally feel that you're actually on the way to the top of the mountain? Having a 'partial' birds' eye view about the surrounding and realizing things you never knew?
Who never had that ought to be shot man!
For me, my internship experiences and the many interesting people I met along the way taught me a lot of things. And made me realize many of my mistakes I did in the past.
Do you wish to turn the time back and rectify it?
For me, not really. If i did that, wouldn't my mind + memory of the incident be erased? I mean, unlogical logically speakingly..... :)
But truth be told, we all made mistakes in our lives. And I love the fact that we all, human beings, love to push the blame unto another person's shoulder. Don't you think I don't too? I am but human. But then again, I guess it is always the other way around and sometimes out of revenge, I just like to get even with you.
And you wouldn't want to know how I was in school during my secondary years where skipping class with lame reasons like "saya nak pergi tandas lao sai" and "sorry cikgu, perut amat sakit, lao sai lama lama" and crap of such. It happened. Why not? I was indeed a student from HELL.. And IF Mr. Lim, Pn. Yeoh, Pn. Geetha reads this, they might just nod their head and say, "Yes girl. I am glad you came to your senses"....
And after how long?
Gosh..... It was like, it took me aeons to get over the feeling, the hurt, rejection, anger and all other negative, repulsive feelings. AND IF YOU THINK YOU ARE BAD TEMPERED, think again man... I might just be your best competitor!
Back to being on the mountain... I was up on the 'mountain of life' although it felt like just 20% of the height. But man, I really saw alot of things I never saw before. The beautiful scenery at the foot of the hill (richess, prosperity, or anything that has gotta do with God giving me a great family but I never really appreciated it until now) and all the chopped trees (mistakes I have made against others, causing grief, distress, anger, unhappiness etc...) and boy, was it like a magical journey.
Dad once told me before about a story of a man who had 2 bags of faults. One belonging to him and another, of his neighbors/ He hung his fault behind his back and his neighbor's fault-filled basket in front so he always saw the fault of others. I guess we have all been that conceited before. I have and sometimes, still will fall prey to the human sin. Who doesn't? The person who says he/she does not do that are either very righteous and really right people or they are plainly hypocrites like all of the world including myself!
I lie to myself everyday! -- I tell myself that today will be a great freaking day, but guess what? not always will that happen! Gosh, I am the biggest liar of the century and should be banished to hell but HECK with it, some lies to your heart makes you feel better...
And that was how '20% mountain' showed me that my house was circled with beautiful plants, trees, clear stream flowing along the side and happy singing birds. But I am disillusioned by the fact that the stream flowing downwards got polluted by loggers and trees are chopped for paper, animals caught to be barbequed.... Do you have such a life?
And I guess, we are all not that different after all. But the age old question still remains..... What will your next action plan be?
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